MY LIFE *** MY WAY

I..really don't know what to put for my title, but one thing I know now, is...I can't cover any of the sadness in my heart.

My family...they should know..I;m feeling extreme sad now. Even you wana ground me, I'll just accept whatever it comes. But...NOT NOW!

I just want a happy ending with him before he leaves. Why am I not able to do that? I'm going to 21!!! That seems like meaningless to me. I'm feeling useless, helpless and speechless.

I just wana do something that I like. I can even just skip my 21st Birthday celebration. But plz...don't make me feel this way..it's so meaningless to me!

Sometimes, I wish I could fly...fly away to a place where I can find my happiness..escape from this situation which has tighten me for years...! I'm fear, lack of courage. But, this time, I WON'T GIVE IN!!!

Today..I just can't stop my tears from droping down. I just can't keep the sadness from affecting my mind. Thinking of what my family has told, that makes me not willing to let him go away from me today. I'm happy for his achievement, but I know, after he came back, we'll hardly meet each other then. I'm just feeling sad once I think abt this and I just wana cry.....cry so badly...........